wishes us all to be generous, cheerful and independent ourselves.
-01-
A video went viral on Weibo some time ago. On a hot day, a woman was walking alone on the highway with a children's cart.
when the police asked the reason, the woman said that the toll was not enough, and her husband asked her to contact her parents-in-law to transfer money, but she disagreed, so the husband angrily left her and his one-year-old son driving away.
it was not until the next day that the husband received a transfer of 400 yuan from his father-in-law to pick them up.
the news made people laugh and cry. I didn't expect that the couple would be red-faced because of a few hundred yuan, and the husband would "abandon his wife and children" because of a mere 400 yuan of tolls, not to mention that he had already started a new family and had to brazenly ask his parents-in-law for money....
of course, this video also reveals a cruel truth-the lack of money in marriage can lead to a lot of conflicts. No matter how deep the relationship is, husband and wife have to bow to the reality.
A British website has passed the test results: the average couple quarrels over "money" 39 times a year.
it's too expensive to buy food outside, too many gifts to relatives, and children don't have enough money for tutoring classes.
these quarrels caused by money will imperceptibly tear apart the relationship between husband and wife until they reach a tipping point of explosion and let the relationship fall apart.
Marriage is like building a house. Without a good material foundation, it is difficult to secure it.
-02-
I remember that in a love and marriage program, the female guest was very beautiful. But her family is far less well-off than her husband, and she earns very little money, so she simply stays unemployed at home after that.
married for more than two years, having children, taking care of children, washing clothes, doing housework, usually buying a bag has to be said by her husband, and she has to bear the indifference of her mother-in-law.
she couldn't stand it and dragged her husband on the show, trying to find a way to reconcile.
as a result, the husband "confronted" her with a straight face all the time, leaving no trace of affection. Finally, I would like to say, "if you don't make money by yourself, I'm the one who keeps you."
in real life, many people are the same as that female guest, because they choose comfort with a promise, but they don't even have the strength to stand beside the person you love if they don't work hard to make money.
the famous economist Dan Ariely once did an interesting marriage matching experiment.
in this experiment, the staff found 100 volunteers, half male and half female, each with a number from 1 to 100 on their back to represent their value.
then let the 100 people find a mate of the opposite sex on their own. The bigger the sum of the two, the higher the bonus.
for example, if they pair No. 80 and No. 81, they will get a total bonus of $1610, while girls No. 1 and No. 2 will only get a bonus of $30.
in this way, everyone tries their best to please people with large numbers in order to maximize their interests.
those with a value of more than 90 are like "all the stars holding the moon". You only have to choose what you like among the people who are trying to find a match.
corresponding to those under 10, no one will take the initiative to look for them, even if they "take the initiative to attack", others are also superior posture.
in the end, people under 10 are either paired with another person under 10 to keep warm, or with a higher number, but at the expense of a bonus of "37 points" or even "28 points".
in fact, marriage is like this pairing test, all the gifts of fate have long been secretly priced. The more valuable you are, the more respect and kindness you are entitled to receive.
work hard to make money, money may not make you meet love, but at least it will make you absolutely decent in love.
not over-dependent, not blindly ingratiating, have goals to fight for, but also have the ability to support themselves, this is the highest way for a woman to live.
-03-
there is a line in the TV series "my first half of my Life":
No one will be the safe haven in this life as you think. Only you are your last refuge.
Luo Zijun in the play, at first, was trapped in her husband's oath that he would "support you for a lifetime" and became a rich wife with peace of mind. Only when she learned that her husband was having an affair did she wake up. Then return to the workplace, show their edge, step by step out of the haze of marriage.
in marriage, temporary suffering is not terrible, but a lifetime of suffering is terrible.
sometimes, money is strength, dignity and freedom. When you have enough financial support, you will have the courage to say goodbye to the wrong person and turn around.
A good marriage is always evenly matched. If you are not qualified enough to work hard, then you can only meet the so-called "similar" people.
even if you are lucky enough to marry a "much better" person, if you do not climb up and try to reach that height, the sense of gap between you will make you fall into the abyss.
No matter when and where, one's own efforts are always more secure than relying on others.
when you are rich, you no longer have to look at other people's faces to buy your favorite bag.
you can buy whatever your family likes without hesitation;
when you are in a good mood, you can take a walk-and-go trip at any time.
when you are in a bad mood, you don't have to cry secretly in the little bathroom, but you can cry in the car, in the house, in the resort hotel.
.
when you get through the hardship of making money, you also have more rights to make choices in life.
as Maugham once said in the shackles of Human Nature:
May we all be generous, cheerful and independent ourselves, who can endure the hardships of making money and the sweetness of marriage.
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