duhaoshu

A hundred years of Solitude says:

"We tend to walk in the ancient journey of life, running in ups and downs, Nirvana in setbacks, sorrow all over the body, pain floating all over the place."

it is said that life is hard, but in fact, life has never been difficult for anyone.

when you are unhappy, it is often a mismatch between cognition and desire, resulting in emotional defeat.

in the final analysis, the afflictive thing is the lack of wisdom.

take yourself too seriously

have seen a small questionnaire to test whether you are sensitive and paranoid:

do you often suspect that you have done something wrong and said something wrong?

do you feel that people around you don't like it, or that it's always directed at you?

after making mistakes, do you keep repeating the process of making mistakes in your mind?

do you always feel that there is something in the words of the leader or family, and the eyes are meaningful …...

after browsing, I suddenly feel that each item is written according to myself.

look, this is wishful thinking.

in fact, most of these phenomena, including delusions at this moment, take themselves too seriously. this is not a sign of their own attention, but because their self-awareness is too weak.

because I don't know how to realize myself, I feel that any small thing can be a devastating blow.

there is a netizen talking about a colleague with a bad temper, who clearly does not have a high grade and cares about everything, and he wants to be serious about what he says wrong.

after dinner, everyone shunned him.

until one day netizens went upstairs with him, and no one else was there, so his colleague said in a very low voice, "it's really tiring day by day, isn't it?" He looks like two people from the one who usually yells.

as the psychological "Duck" effect says, when you don't know enough, you often make the wrong decision without thinking, but you don't even know it's wrong.

when you feel like everything around you is against you, it's not life that sucks.

put aside the "ego" and face all kinds of time with a more open mind, the scenery will be different.

actor Guo Jingfei once said that when he was at school, he was fragile and depressed, and he frowned every day.

until the end, he thought he was great. Guo Jingfei quarreled with people for fear of being refuted.

he drinks too much when he can't stand it, and he even wants to kill himself.

then he began to jump out, act in comedies, try things he had never thought of, his state of mind opened up, and his acting skills gradually became recognized.

looking back, he said, "Don't take yourself too seriously. it solves too many wringing things on me."

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what you want to do and what you think is beyond the definition of others, so don't define yourself too early.

there are really not so many people staring at you and taking great pains to deny you.

when you figure it out, you live.

too much of the past to let go

there is a saying that life is after, not before.

but we have too much anxiety precisely because of the past.

just like the wound has formed a scab, but also keep thinking about it, many people's troubles are clearly in the past, but also sentimental over and over again.

look at two stories first:

the first one is Li Xuelian, who has complained and petitioned for more than a decade in I am not Pan Jinlian.

, she really suffered, thinking that she and her husband were divorced in a fake way, but as a result, the other party wanted a real divorce. The formalities were complete, there was no way to complain, and she was even vilified by her husband as "Pan Jinlian".

if you sue your ex-husband once, she will sue twice, and if you can't do it twice, she will sue three times.

when she was sued from the county town to Beijing, she was sad for most of her life, but when her ex-husband died unexpectedly, she only felt empty and meaningless.

the second is an old blacksmith who has an ancestral purple sand pot in his hand.

at that time, an antique dealer passed by and said that this might be the work of Dai Zhengong, a famous Qing Dynasty pot maker, and he wanted to buy it for 100000 yuan.

the blacksmith didn't sell it on the spot, but the more he thought about it, the more he regretted it.

he was afraid of knocking and touching the teapot, and he was afraid that someone would steal it. Someone came to buy the teapot, and when he remembered the offer from the antique dealer, he was even more unwilling.

unable to sleep over and over again, the blacksmith returned to a peaceful life until he smashed the purple clay pot with his own hands.

one is that life has been hit, the other is a sudden surprise, but the end is the same, they trapped themselves, the whole life, live in the memory of that moment.

what you keep in mind is not necessarily an echo, but it may also be an insurmountable poison and a wound that cannot be cured.

Don't want to be overwhelmed by emotion, just remember this sentence:

"everything will pass."

you don't have to pull out the knife in the wound from time to time and insert it back in pain.

think about this when you are surprised, calm down, think about it when you are sad, and let yourself jump out quickly.

keep looking forward, embracing every moment of new things, the past is buried in the past.

do not do much, think too much

there is nothing perfect in life. You must choose the same between the bitterness of life and the suffering of growth.

when the tide of life rushes down, there are only two kinds of people who don't feel sad.

one is the diver of life, who can remain motionless when life is ever-changing, and the other is the surfer of life. If there is a difficulty, then rise to the challenge.

but most anxious people happen to be somewhere in between, both greedy for good days.I don't bother to move forward. I not only want to go to the future, but also suffer from the bone feeling of reality.

reason tells you to go to work and subconsciously want to touch fish;

reason wants to learn some industry knowledge, subconsciously wants to browse small videos;

rational people go to the gym when they want to get off work, and their subconscious wants to lie down on the sofa.

when you watch the subconscious triumph over reason again and again, and life gets out of control again and again, how can it not be bad?

but it's not inevitable. I don't get tired of looking at anything in a different way of thinking.

saw a very interesting picture called "then what are you worried about":

the bad things you encounter can't be solved, so what are you worried about?

the troubles in life can be solved as soon as they can be solved, so what are you worried about?

the power of action is far stronger than you think.

there is an interview with anxiety as the theme.

there are all aspects of anxiety involved, but without exception, there are "experienced people" experience for reference.

some people quit their jobs and are confused for a long time.

he began to reflect on how much he liked a job and whether he could be competent, so that he gradually confirmed the industry he wanted to engage in, and was no longer pessimistic.

some people are born with small eyes, flat nose, and have been discriminated against for a long time.

relying on her ultra-high sensitivity, she became a counselor and no longer took her appearance seriously.

someone is going to give a lecture to the bosses of the industry, so nervous that they can't sleep.

she prepared the courseware for two weeks, and finally 1/3 of the teachers took the initiative to communicate with her on Wechat.

those who are financially anxious, rely on planning to save money to find sense of security.

if it's stressful to compare with friends, join them to move forward. Who doesn't come from anxiety and get through the road?

even Ji Xianlin is of ordinary origin.

he gets up at 4 o'clock every morning, adheres to regular working hours, and races against the clock to conceive his work between meetings, before he gradually becomes a master, slow and sensible.

Wang Xiaobo has a saying: "all people's pain is essentially anger at their own incompetence."

when you take "solve" or "put down" as multiple choice questions, worry is minimized.

when you think of ability as something you can improve, the status quo as something that can change for the better.

you will know that there is nothing to worry about in the world.

the movie "the Godfather" says:

"people who see the essence in one second are destined to have a different fate than those who can't see the essence of a thing in half a lifetime."

Don't take yourself too seriously. if there are few people who care about you, not many will want to hurt you.

Don't be so obsessed with the past, the past is out of date, and the good and bad have to be passed.

Don't just think about it and you can't get rid of your worries, so do it again.

you just need to have a positive attitude, let go of greed and live in the present.

like Xi Murong's poem: "setbacks will come, they will pass, tears will flow down, and they will stop. Nothing can discourage me, because I have a long life."

, replace sadness with thinking, and drive suffering away with mood.